Oh City of our Hearts
21/7/2014, San Francisco, CA`
I remember when I was younger and I wanted to be beautiful; now I’m older and I want to be intelligent. I want to burn hearts with brilliance and engulf souls with compassion. I want to be loved for my thoughts and nothing else.
I am scared of falling in love, of craving you every second of every day, of needing you, of being addicted to you. I am scared of missing you more than I can handle, of losing you and myself in you. I am scared of not being enough, and of seeing my insufficiency in your eyes
The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies.
Finally learning to let you go. Distance can either make you grow fonder of each other or further your distance. We were meant to cross path but not lead to one another. It’s about time I not care so much for you. It’s about time I stop fighting and wondering. It’s time to move on.
Schooling has been one powerful way to reproduce colonial repression by justifying and perpetuating, inside the classroom, existing ignorance, hiding from students, especially those of color, alternative histories. This prevents students from learning the societies and cultures from which oppressed people come and the great things those societies and cultures have achieved.
My heart is crying yearning for you. It’s been almost 3 1/2years and it hasn’t gotten better since the first day you left. I still cry just as much missing you. Everything reminds me of you. In fact, the distance makes me misses you even more each and everyday. Each day doesn’t get any easier. How do people deal with this? My wound was cut deep and I don’t know if it’s still healing or if it’s a scar already. Whoever says that “only with time things will get better” they are freaken lying. I’m still looking for someone who’d even come close to love me unconditionally just as much as you but I fear that day will never come. I’m destined to be forever alone. Each and everyday I feel like I’m losing myself. Feel soo alone in this 2 billion+ people of a world.
Most traditional Hmong families do not want to hear direct comments about their children, especially infants and babies. A comment such as “your child is cute” is not appreciated. Hmong believe that if a bad spirit hears such comments, it might come and take the child’s soul away.
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